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My Bonus Mom: Taking the Step out of Stepmom, by Tami Butcher
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In rhythmic verse, My Bonus Mom!, shows children of divorced families that a positive attitude can lead to a happy outcome and springs open their hearts and minds to accept their own bonus moms. It captures the mixed emotions that surge through young children as they deal with divorce and adjust to remarriage. The children work through their feelings of dismay, fear and anger, and grow to love dad's new wife, whom they come to think of as their bonus mom. Twice the attention, twice the love, twice the fun and twice as many birthday presents! What's not to love?
- Sales Rank: #1035153 in Books
- Brand: Little Five Star
- Model: FBA-|287604
- Published on: 2011-08-15
- Released on: 2011-08-29
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.10" h x .30" w x 8.00" l, .65 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
- 46 pages
- Used Book in Good Condition
Review
Tami has thoughtfully and directly dealt with a topic generally associated with negative stereotypes in our society. While her words should be recommended reading to children involved in stepfamily situations, they are of equal importance to the adults involved as well. This book shows a combined family is not about making a choice of one or the other, rather it is an opportunity filled with endless positive possibilities. The best interests of the children is a frequent phrase in the world of divorce and stepfamilies. Tami successfully provides a road map with potential positive long-term effects for a child and family. ----Tim Mead, V.P. LA Angels of Anaheim
This book beautifully captures the step-parent and how he/she can be a wonderful added gift to a family. It is a great way to dispel the evil stepmother label that has been drilled into our society by old fairy tales. Happily ever after and Step Parents CAN go hand in hand. ----Bill and Gail Engvall, Comedian, Televison Star of The Bill Engvall
This is an excellent way to show children, through the eyes of the author, Tami s, experience, that they can have a great relationship with a new stepmother, without being disloyal to Mom, and that divorces are not the fault of the children. --Tom Horne, Arizona State Attorney General
This book beautifully captures the step-parent and how he/she can be a wonderful added gift to a family. It is a great way to dispel the evil stepmother label that has been drilled into our society by old fairy tales. Happily ever after and Step Parents CAN go hand in hand. ----Bill and Gail Engvall, Comedian, Televison Star of The Bill Engvall
This is an excellent way to show children, through the eyes of the author, Tami s, experience, that they can have a great relationship with a new stepmother, without being disloyal to Mom, and that divorces are not the fault of the children. --Tom Horne, Arizona State Attorney General
About the Author
An Arizona girl whose roots grow deep in the state her grandmother graduated from Phoenix Union High School in 1935 Tami Butcher has seen the Valley grow into the metropolis it is today. She graduated from the University of Arizona with a degree in business communications and later earned a teaching degree from Grand Canyon University. It was while teaching seventh-graders at Phoenix Prep Academy, that she made it her goal to write a children's book. But first, she married the love of her life, Mike, and started a family. She currently has three children ages 6, 9 and 13. As a child, Butcher grew up with what she lovingly refers to as her bonus mom, a nurturing, caring woman many in society would refer to as a stepmother. Butcher's parents amicably divorced when she was 11, and for the sake of Butcher and her three sisters, decided to keep each other fully involved in their children's lives despite the divorce. Eventually both her parents remarried, but they continued to share birthdays, holidays and special times together with their children, as well as with their new spouses. Because of her parents' efforts, Butcher and her sisters grew up feeling blessed for having two moms and dads instead of stepparents. Reflecting on her own family dynamics, Butcher realized that if she could plant a seed in children's minds that having a stepmother or stepfather can be a bonus, then their minds and hearts might grow to accept their parents' new spouses instead of automatically thinking of them as evil as many childhood fairytales portray them. The product of that revelation was My Bonus Mom! Always a philanthropic person, Butcher dedicates her time to helping others in need. She is currently a member of the East Valley Women s League, a nonprofit 501(c)(3) that raises funds for more than 13 projects for women and children in the Valley, and is slated to be president for 2011-12. Tami gives time to New Hope Church, an inner-city church located in the most impoverished ZIP code in Arizona, and she teaches Art Masterpiece to kindergarten and third-grade classes in Chandler, which lacks the funds for regular Art classes. Currently, Butcher resides in Chandler, Ariz. with her husband and three children, where she helps with the family restaurant business. Her mother and "bonus dad" own two popular restaurants in Phoenix, Rustler's Rooste Steakhouse and Aunt Chilada's. Tami and her three children love to travel to Southern California during baseball season as her husband, Mike, is the pitching coach for the LA Angels of Anaheim. He has been with the Angels for 21 years as both a player and a coach.
Most helpful customer reviews
15 of 16 people found the following review helpful.
Not a great book for growing families where both the Mom and Dad are great parents.
By Chi_girl
I am the stepmother of 2 children ages 5 and 3. My husband and I have a strong, healthy relationship with their mother. We thought this book would help them to understand the role/title of their new step-parent, but it does so by denigrating the father ever so slightly. For example, it shows a picture of the father leaving the house with a box of his things all in a huff and a dog chasing behind him (maybe the dad isn't always the one that leaves or is angry?); on the next page it says, "On Mondays and Tuesdays Mom's dinners were good/On Thursdays and Fridays Dad made what he could" - this is the opposite in our family and, again, degrades the ability of a father. We're all very aware of the negative connotation men get in divorce and/or child custody - and there are plenty of stories to support it. But there are just as many stories of truly wonderful fathers who are every bit as good of a dad as the mommy is a mom (and stories where the mom isn't involved at all). Really wish this book would have done a better job holding both parents up on a pedestal so our children could relate. Unfortunately, the negative stereotypes softly perpetuated in the book take away from the real beauty of a growing family out of divorce.
3 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
LOVED it!!
By Katie
I bought this book for my husband to read to my future stepson, who is five. He seems to have some loyalty conflicts and he is often confused as to what my role as stepmom is. This book is best read by the child's father, or even their mother (wishful thinking on my part, I guess), since it starts out addressing deeper issues like the parents fighting, telling the kids they are divorcing, and dad moving to a new house. But then it says how every other weekend they went to dad's, they got to have two of each holiday and birthday, and it was great. It explains how they felt when dad met someone new and that their mom even liked her. When the dad married the new woman, the kids said how no one can replace mom, but the new woman is a *bonus*, and is simply another person to love them. I think it appropriately explains what a stepmom is to children between the ages 4-7. When my fiance read this book to his five year old, you could see him thinking and making connections during certain parts of the book. I am very very happy and grateful I made this purchase!!
2 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
5 year old loves this book
By MD1985
Very positive book for our 5 year old. The role of step mom is very confusing to a kindergarten. This book helped defined the roles of the dad, the stepmom and the mom without disrespecting the birth mom. This book was up beat, rhymed (what 5 year old doesn't like that), and was written in simple terms that clearly defined the positivity of a step mom/bonus mom. Part of what makes this book unique is the fact that it was written by a child of a step parent, instead of a step parent to a child. Highly recommend this book for new or soon to be step moms.
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